To the 45th Guy in the White House...

Dear Charlatan-in-Chief ~

Reporting on the dishonest, bigoted, misogynistic, and asinine things you do is not "fake" news. Fake would better describe things like your "respect for women" or your newfound piety or your administration's embracing of "alternate facts". Yes, so stop with the fake finger-pointing and bullying of those news outlets who aren't kissing your butt. And the fact that you're doing this while traveling abroad for the G20 is embarrassing as hell. You make us look like a bunch of thuggish, furiously flag-waving, blindly-following-you numbskulls--which most of us are not. Jiminy Crickets, you're highly reminiscent of that crooked Prince John from Disney's Robin Hood...that comparison, as you would say, is "very bad!"

Instead of you constantly foaming at the mouth and the tweet about this "fake news", might I suggest you try pulling up your big boy pants and behaving like a thoughtful, decent, mature adult who has a vocabulary above the 3rd grade level? Furthermore, many of us (like NBC) don't give a rat's ass about your days on The Apprentice. That's like your frequent throwbacks to Hillary--both are currently irrelevant. Live in the now! 

So to review:
•no more bratty, whiny, manby tantrums
•news about things you actually do = not fake; you and your administration = the epitome of fake
•speak and behave as a mature adult would
•stop trying to muddy the news with your irrelevant babble
You can keep your "modern day presidential"; many of us would just like to once again have a POTUS who doesn't act like a whiny, imbecilic, seriously unhinged, spoiled brat. 

Sincerely,
The Majority of Americans 
(most of who did not elect you, but which now includes a few regretful ones who did)