Resentment Is Like Drinking Poison...

This is a brilliant analogy. For supposedly being the most evolved and self-aware creatures on the planet, we humans can be fragile, ego-driven beings who work so hard at trying to fool people around us...maybe we even think we can fool ourselves. (We can't.) But holding on to resentment never, ever ends well.

Sure, we all temporarily harbor a little resentment or anger from time to time. (Hey, we're human!) But to make an occupation of it--that takes enormous compartmentalizing, the memory of an elephant, and a serious lack of hobbies. Worst of all, it damages relationships; and, ultimately, it erodes the spirit of the grudge-holder, in the way a choppy surf erodes a shoreline.

I was recently visited by the resentment of someone in my life. It reared it's ugly head in a gift shop, of all places. One passing question from the clerk solicited a rare, honest comment from this person. From that instant, this person couldn't recover from the fact that they had actually made a genuine statement about their resentment towards me. So, very unfortunately, the remainder of our day together was peppered with this person alternately trying to smooth-over their original comment and, yet, also (once again) air their almost two-decades-old grievance.

I have empathy for the fact that deep down inside their heart, this resentment comes from hurt. I don't wish for anyone to be hurting. At the same time, geez--way past time to unpack that toxic baggage! This person's inability to see past this one event has always hindered our relationship. One choice decided my place in this person's mind and heart--that has not and will not ever change. I know this because I've tried. And tried. And tried. It took me a good 10 years to realize that nothing I ever subsequently did or said would ever make up for my supposed misstep of 17 years ago. I finally gave up futilely trying to convince this person to put down the poison bottle. I "let it go" (to quote another strong female character) because I won't allow my spirit to be poisoned by another's darkness. Do not ever allow someone's negativity to erode your spirit! 

I am sad for this person because they'll keep drinking from that ol' poison bottle, hoping that I'll be the one who's damaged. And in their pain and resentment they have and will continue to miss out on many potentially beautiful moments.